Squidward: So, you say we should go that way?
SpongeBob: Yea.
Squidward: Then I'm going this way.

SpongeBob: It's not just a boulder, *sniff* it's a rock.

SpongeBob: You know what else, else? I think the pizza's getting cold.

Sponge, looking at checklist: "Pretending to drown --- NO."

Larry: "...Could you sign my pants?"

Patrick: now THATS fancy...they should call you Spongebob Fancypants!

Spongebob is at Sandy's tree dome, dehydrated.
Spongebob: (puts his pinky up) "I don't need water! Water is for quitters!" (walks toward the picnic bench) "I don't need it! I don't need it! I don't need it!" (stops) "I NEEEEEEEED IT!"

Computer: "Plankton: 1% Evil, 99% Hot Gas"

Plankton: Booster seat, hot Dog! I mean no.

Mrs. Puff: Cheat that way Spongebob!

Spongebob: Youre Pink!

Patrick: Well youre Yellow!

Pants rip off

Spongebob: Yellow!

Patrick: Pink!

Spongebob: Lets always be friends!

Patrick: You know, these were white when I bought them.

Spongebob:Gary! Don't stop shaking it!

Patrick: My ice cream! It's alive!

Squidward: SpongeBob's the only person I know that can have fun with a jellyfish FOR 12 HOURS!

Squidward, can you play your clarinet a little... better?

SpongeBob: Why did you eat my boots Mr. Krabs?

Squidward: Let me show you guys how much I...HATE YOU!!!
SpongeBob: Patrick, did you ever get the feeling that Squidward likes us too much?

Realtor: You're Squidward, he's Squidward...I'M SQUIDWARD!
Are there any other SQUIDWARDS I should know about?
Gary (in Squidward's voice): Meow.
Realtor (frowning): I'm outta here.

SpongeBob: Gary, where's you're holiday spirit?
Gary: Woof

Spongebob: One time I saw this magician and he did this thing... and anyhow he said if you believe and with a tiny pinch of magic all of your dreams can come true
Plankton: After all these years I thought I was the master of torture, but that!

Patrick: You're yellow, yellow is ugly.

SpongeBob: Why did you eat my boots Mr. Krabs?

Patrick: One watermelon fresh from the manure field, your ghostliness.

Squidward: Loser!
Spongebob: 26 time loser!

Spongebob: (sobbing) "Can I still wear the wig?"
Pearl: "Yes, you can still wear the wig."
Spongebob: (rushing out of the bathroom) "Let's go!"

Patrick on the megaphone: "I'm not Spongebob! Those are my street clothes!"

Spongebob:Of course! Everything is chrome in the future!

Sponge: "The time machine is down the hall and to the left."
Squidward walks in and comes out in small slices.
Sponge: "Oh, oops. That one's the can opener."

SpongeBob: No Gary, I like wearing my underwear this way.

Spongebob: Patrick, what am I?
Patrick: Stupid?
Spongebob: No, I'm Texas.
Patrick: What's the difference?

Patrick: Can we say people from Texas are dumb?
Sandy: No!
Patrick: Can we say plants from Texas are dumb?
Sandy: No!
Patrick: Can we say shoes from Texas are dumb?
Sandy: No! You can't say anthing dumb about Texas!

Spongebob: "Plankton! You didn't tell me everyone would leave!"
Plankton: (sarcastically) "Oops!"

Plankton: BUTTERFLY KISSES! CAN'T TAKE IT! IT'S TOO CUTE!

Patrick, with eight hooks sticking out of his mouth: "Does this look dangerous to you?"

Pearl: Look! It's SpongeBob Nudiepants!

Sponge: Hi Squidward! All done with those erins?
Squid: No I am not! I just remembered... I needed change for this dollar.
Sponge: Do you want 4 quarters, or 10 dimes, or 20 nickels, or 100 pennies, or 1 quarter 3 dimes 7 nickels & 10 pennies? Or if you give my a 5$ bill your options are...
Squid: All right! Goobye.

Spongebob: Hey, my friend's in there!
Fish: Congratulations

Spongebob: It's his first time on his own.
Fish: Once again, congatulations.

Narrator: Everyday is a holiday for Spongebob even if he has to make one up.
Patrick: "Boy,It was sure nice of Mr. Krabs to give me a
job"
Spongebob: "and at $50 dollars an hour too!,when I started
working here,I had to pay Mr. Krab a $100 dollars an hour!"

Trophy reading: "This award goes to Mr. Patrick Star for spending the longest amount of time doing absolutely nothing"

(phone rings)

Person 1: Is this the Krusty Krab?

Patrick: No this is Patrick.

(phone rings again)

Person 2: Is this the Krusty Krab?

Patrick: NO, this is Patrick!

Person 3: Is this the Krusty Krab?

Patrick: NO! THIS IS PATRICK!

Patrick: I am not a Krusty Krab!

Spongebob: Umm... Patrick, the Krusty Krab is the name of the restaurant.

Sandy: Hello little critter, what's your name?
Mom: Don't stand too close to a squirrel, Billy, you'll catch its stupid.

Spongebob:This is great! Just the three of us. You, me, and this brick wall you build between us.

Spongebob: Gary! You are going to eat your dessert and you are going to like it!

SpongeBob: Now you try.
Squidward: THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT YOU BARNACLE HEAD!
SpongeBob: Ohh. Good one.

Spongebob: "Squidward, we already played babble like an idiot!"

Spongebob: "I'm sorry, grandmother, but the kissing has to stop."
Patrick: "Tell it like it is, Spongebob."

Squidward: I'd hate to burst your bubble SpongeBob, but they are laughing AT YOU not WITH YOU.

Spongebob: "I won't stop for a little...
E D U C A T I O N A L T E L E V I S I O N ! ! ! ! ! ! !"
Mrs. Puff: "Looks like that got rid of him."